My God It's Full Of Stats!
Stats & Text Index


23 Jun 2004:

Yeah, I'm a lazy ass. Yes, I know I haven't updated this
page in seven months.  My apologies to the 6 or 7 people 
who were regularly reading the stats (and at least 3 of 
them were me), but I'm not going to be able to do regular 
updates anymore. (With most of the precincts reporting 
in, we can safely project slibs as the winner and next governor
of Arizona.) It's not that I have a life now or anything 
like that--my new job in DC is hella busy, and being a lazy ass, 
I still haven't gotten internet access from home, only 
through work. Moreover, I can't transfer this page from 
ucla to my new job, where the guidelines are pretty strict about 
what web pages I can get away with hosting (Use fur ze academic
research only! Nein fur ze playtime! Und vy not? Because 
playtime ist verboten! Ein Reich, ein Paycheck!... Even 
work-related academic research webpages that don't comply with 
some gov't bureaucrat's peculiar standards get booted occasionally, 
which means they actually check here. Quite scary, really.)
and I only have extremely limited access to my old account. 
If someone else wants to host the page and count the stats, 
you're more than welcome to (if you know Fortran and Unix, 
I can send you the laughably-inefficiently-coded scripts.)

As far as the text index goes (useful for finding a particular 
active panel when you've forgotten the date), I can still 
update that (easy for me to edit), but impossible for me to 
host. Any takers? If so, contact me at my old email address, agm 
at astro dot ucla dot edu. I'll just email you an ascii html text file 
once a week or so. Or you can just do it yourself, it's not 
hard to write "6/15: Dolly points" or "6/16: Jeffy says something 
to befuddle Bil", etc. and type in the right links.

Later,
Alex (a.k.a. agm)



Stats covering 17 Sept 2001 -- 4 Oct 2003 (18793 caps, 641 panels)

NAME No. Perc. Max Num Num Panel Caps of all Caps Hat Panel Appearance Caps in 1 Trix Appear Streak pan. slibs 4086 21.74 50 548 636 554 Nyder 1722 9.16 11 343 556 324 GeniusLoci/Kensu 1032 5.49 12 130 466 45 Frenchy, the Toad Swallower 950 5.06 11 119 464 100 crude ed/Mr Vain 838 4.46 14 105 374 20 Jenn Dolari 789 4.20 6 73 472 25 agm 724 3.85 5 65 426 23 Pandemic 708 3.77 11 107 321 43 Featureless Void 701 3.73 16 124 258 213 Lots42 692 3.68 9 88 370 25 Les Miserables 549 2.92 21 71 168 49 Pete 548 2.92 7 72 269 19 Namgubed the Merry Elf 512 2.72 4 16 416 50 rudy 511 2.72 4 29 347 59 Hysterical Woman 463 2.46 5 44 281 32 Vice Pope Doug 421 2.24 12 64 106 92 Papuasblya 380 2.02 15 46 184 19 Loganvision 306 1.63 4 15 236 6 Dave Matthews 295 1.57 4 28 179 11 frer 242 1.29 4 25 151 58 A Grouch 240 1.28 5 19 150 39 The Hanged Man 224 1.19 6 28 109 14 Freddie E. Johnson, Jr. 222 1.18 5 29 109 19 (anon) 123 0.65 4 3 102 3 Test Bunny 119 0.63 10 22 41 20 My Dixie Wrecked 110 0.59 3 4 88 4 Vic 108 0.57 3 1 97 4 Tweek 93 0.49 6 4 66 5 Doihle 86 0.46 4 5 61 6 Kelvin the Clown 82 0.44 8 16 27 5 Ben-Wa Mandelbrot 81 0.43 4 4 57 9 Kid Polio/The Living End 80 0.43 3 3 59 9 Rodney 54 0.29 4 2 45 8 bongthegong 44 0.23 2 0 37 4 Orrin 39 0.21 2 0 35 2 PhineasBg 38 0.20 1 0 38 4 cornhalf 38 0.20 6 1 30 3 Tintin Macoute 36 0.19 3 1 33 2 Mercutio Jones 31 0.16 2 0 30 4 Sophie The Dog 26 0.14 1 0 26 3 obvious alias 26 0.14 3 1 22 4 N.J. 22 0.12 2 0 19 3 Cadillac Man 21 0.11 3 1 16 2 Teen LaQueefah 21 0.11 2 0 19 2 Hugh Jass 18 0.10 4 1 14 6 finch 18 0.10 3 1 15 3 The Janitor 17 0.09 3 1 10 2 Mario 16 0.09 4 2 11 4 The Return of Martin Short 15 0.08 3 2 10 3 Erik 13 0.07 2 0 11 3 Ernest Fucking Hemingway* 13 0.07 2 0 12 1 DiscoStu 11 0.06 2 0 10 3 Liv Tyler, Who's Your Daddy!? 11 0.06 2 0 8 3 Liz Hurley's Talking Panties 11 0.06 2 0 7 2 ForemastJack/Zestfully Me! 9 0.05 2 0 8 3 hambone 9 0.05 2 0 7 2 grumbo 8 0.04 2 0 7 3 BalancedBob 7 0.04 1 0 7 1 Bernt Pancreas 7 0.04 3 1 5 3 Vaca 7 0.04 3 1 5 2 monkeyboy 7 0.04 1 0 7 1 AJ 6 0.03 1 0 6 1 The Most Holy Slobberama 6 0.03 1 0 6 1 Auriam 5 0.03 3 1 2 2 Ex-Gaijin Marty 5 0.03 1 0 5 1 Jacksoffville, FL 5 0.03 2 0 4 2 Pete B. 5 0.03 1 0 5 3 Rhea 5 0.03 2 0 4 2 Roy 5 0.03 2 0 4 1 Stan Xhiao 5 0.03 2 0 4 2 Ganlc 4 0.02 2 0 3 2 SnowDog 4 0.02 1 0 4 2 goblinshark 4 0.02 1 0 4 2 Coder 3 0.02 1 0 3 1 Flower Child 3 0.02 1 0 3 1 Inky 3 0.02 1 0 3 2 Mr Obvious 3 0.02 2 0 2 1 Phil Harmonic 3 0.02 1 0 3 1 just some guy 3 0.02 1 0 3 2 zen 3 0.02 1 0 3 1 -+=h_m=+- 2 0.01 1 0 2 1 Bunny 2 0.01 1 0 2 1 J. Keane & Dad 2 0.01 1 0 2 2 MaeBea 2 0.01 1 0 2 2 Mike D'Mike 2 0.01 1 0 2 1 Norm DePlume 2 0.01 1 0 2 1 Rev. Syung Myung Me 2 0.01 1 0 2 1 Roger Nystrom 2 0.01 1 0 2 1 Shepherd 2 0.01 2 0 1 1 Smart Alex 2 0.01 1 0 2 2 Some Guy 2 0.01 1 0 2 1 St. Rudy of the Obvious. 2 0.01 1 0 2 1 chickabiddy 2 0.01 1 0 2 1 Al, Anon, anon, Sir!, Bite me, Phoebe Halliwell, Bob, Captain Obvious, Christopher, Doc Savage, Dr. Kildare, Drake Freisler, Duhstorm, Earl Hofert, FirstTimeBeGentle, Freddie Mercury, Freddie Mercury's Left Nut, Gern, Happy Hobo, Heath, Insane Person, John Salcido, Kawaii, Little Sister @ Cliff of Insanity, Merlin the Dog, Miserable Vomitous Mass, MrZyzyk, Mt. Fuji, Norfolk and Waypal, Not Confessing To This One, Not Ron Post, Not-Bil, Parizeau910-Ephesians 6:1, QWERTY, S, Sir Laurence Olivier, Sir Not Appearing in this Film, Stainless Boy, Tossed Salad Man, Trinity's Leather Pants, Vice Cardinal Sin, \, a long timer..., anon sequitur, another Hallmark moment, baba, clang, da dung, fait accompli, foxy7, friday_jones, nutella, ocfernan, r@fink, some guy, swampy, tHEnEWgUY, tmc, who cares? and x each at 1 0.01 1 0 1 1 Columns are: No. Caps = Number of accepted captions Prec. of all caps = Percentage of the total no. of accepted caps (18793) Max. Caps 1 pan. = Maximum no. of accepted caps in any one panel Num Hat Trix = 3 or more accepted caps in a panel Num Panel Appear = Number of panel appearances (no. of panels where their name appears at all) Panel Appearance Streak = Largest No. of consecutive panel appearances for that person

  • NOTES:

  • I didn't make any effort to remove doubly-posted captions (e.g., agm for 011024, Loganvision for 011027, etc.) or to combine aliases (though I assume for instance that Lots, Lots42, and Lots42@aol are all the same person, and It's a Vice Pope Christmas means VPD, etc.). So view these caption totals as having a slight uncertainty or a correction associated with them.

  • *Ernest Fucking Hemingway also includes Ernest Fucking Hemingway Saves Christmas, The Importance of Being Ernest Fucking Hemingway, Ode on a Grecian Ernest Fucking Hemingway, Everybody Fucking Mariel Hemingway, Howard Sternest Fucking Hemingway, Psychic Fernest Fucking Hemingway, Taciturn-est Frigging Hemingway, how much does a hemingway?

  • KidPolio/The Living End: includes Josh Burbank Lives!

  • GeniusLoci: includes Buttleproof

  • I believe that crude ed and Mr Vain the same captioneer and I have combined their stats, but would like confirmation on this. How about tHEnEWgUY and Tweek?

  • I haven't added any totals from the old (Gen'l Steinhice) stats. Since Red Zone contributions are not annotated, I have ignored them.

  • I'll update this when I can, maybe once every 1-2 months or so, but my real-life workload is intense, stochastic, and variable, so be patient. Dec 2003--Jan 2004: I'm in the process of moving across the country and starting a new job, so don't hold your breath.

  • No, I wouldn't necessarily say this is obsessive. THIS, on the other hand, is.

  • No, I don't count them up one at a time. I use a series of inefficiently-coded F77 and unix scripts.

  • Enjoy,
    Alex (a.k.a. agm)
    Text Index -- taken down for now. A newer version could have only the active panels listed.


    Back to on.to/oing main page